Sadie

I can see her with my eyes closed
Maybe she’s in a different time zone
I wasn’t there when the lights went out
But also, what the hell do I know?

Most the time I feel like I’m living with my blinds closed
I’ve been making piles of these pencil shavings
Tryna draw her back to life
I remember saying, mom, I think you love her more than you love me

I know that was wrong
Tryna draw back the light
I’ve been making piles of these pencil shavings
As if that’ll bring her home

Oh, and I know better
Despite the fact that y’all think I’m crazy
Well, I may be
But either way I’ma keep shading and erasing
Until I get the contrast right
And I’ma keep shading, erasing

Until I get the contrast right
I know it won’t be tonight
And it won’t be tomorrow either
But if I stop trying, my spirit might die
And my body would crumble

And you’d be left with neither
And where would leave us?
I don’t know, I don’t know
So I’ma keep shading and erasing
Until I get the contrast right
And I’ma keep shading and erasing

Until I get the contrast right
With my hopes so high and my head on fire
Am I floating or flying? Is my bed on fire?
Is this bed even a bed? Am I dead or tired?
There’s red in my eyes, need a bed to disguise

Ain’t not tread on my tires
I got sweat on my palms
Can’t even hold this pencil no more
My head only lies
Can’t trust my mental no more

Gon’ sketch till I can’t even stencil no more
Shading and erasing, yeah
I’ma keep shading and erasing
Until I get the contrast right
I’ma keep shading and erasing
Until I get the contrast right