Jack La Lanne

Blame it on La Lanne when something goes wrong
That sweat-suited scapegoat for the exercising bomb

Put the blame
On jack La Lanne
He’s our man

My lawn turned yellow, my goldfish died
I squirted some Bengay right in my eye

He’s the fucking cause, that sweatsuited scapegoat
With the atomic sock, when he exercises me
I know he doesn’t shower
When I see him beating meat
He makes me want to shower