You Never Met a Motherfucker Quite Like Me

I’ve been on the cover of the Rolling Stone
I met the President when I was half stoned
I’ve been so high I’ve gotten confused
I’ve been beat down broke and used, motherfucker
I drank with Hank
Talked blues with Billy
Rocked with Run
Sang with Shotgun Willy
Went from small time Philly
To big time Bobby
From three day old chili
To sakki with wusabi
I’m home
Hey, I’m home

You never met a motherfucker quite like me
Not like me
Hey like me

No more being poor
Drink specials at winners
Or being ignored
By the think straight sinners
I used to smoke pinners
While my moms made dinner
Now I smoke bombs
And rock with Lynyrd Skynyrd
No beginners here
I’m a seasoned vet
Educated on jazz
By my man Ahmet
Ertegun my friend
I’ve been to the world and back
But I’m a Michigan boy
Can you feel that
And I’m home

(Verse 3)
Never thought I’d go as far in life as this
Never made par
And I could give two shits
Never wanted to sell cars
Because my dad was a dick
Never wanted a guitar
Until I heard a lick like this (“Freebird” by Lynard Skynard plays)
And from the depths of Dixie
To my northern spots
You know it’s time to rock when old glory drops
I pimp through town
With the top let back
Black hat
Fine blond
Cold Pabst in my lap
I’ll adapt
To any and all situations
That’s why they call me the pimp of the nation
Hey bitch
You best believe
I live in the woods
Not your world of greed
Might a little weed
Might a little yea
I’m so proud to be living in the USA

[Chorus]